I have noticed what my distractions are: social media…I spend alot of idle time using social media…especially late at night. It is so easy to grab my laptop at around 11pm (when I should be getting ready for bed) and start watching videos. The thing about it is that one video will turn into one hundred…because of that related videos sidebar. Ive got to let discipline preside in my life. So I am going to hold myself to being in bed by 1am daily…some of you may think that this is still late, but for me, this is extremely early. All I have to do is shut my computer off. Right now, my phone is broken, I was able to tweet from my phone quickly, but Twitter isnt really a problem for me…and neither is Tumblr.

     The things about distractions are that sometimes they can come so subtly that you don’t even notice them because you are used to it. Many times, people are looking for the big distractions, a certain activity, or a certain person or thing. However, many times it is the most miniscule thing that can knock us right off of our paths if we allow it to. One thing about distractions is that they are a time waister. You will look up and the next thing you know, a new year is at hand and you will be making the same goals for the next year as you did for the previous year. I’m evaluating my goals that I made for 2012 and seeing where I am at NOW and I am not waiting another year to make the changes that I need to make.

     I think it is funny because many times we pray for things and we dont get them because of certain habits in our lives…we wait on God and get disappointed because certain things are not happening for us. But in many cases, we have to tweak our habits because if we got what we wanted with the bad habits, those bad habits would cause us to lose what we prayed for..I am learning that to get to destiny, you can not be lazy,always late, undisciplined or a lover of sleep..and those three things are the biggest, yet most subtle things that prohibit us from walking into our destiny. When I was younger, my mother used to tell my sister and I that the early bird catches the worm..Idk who you are, or what you do, if you consistently wake up at 11 and 12 o clock..you couldnt be living very productively. Dont wait to make the changes that you need to make, start today. You want to lose weight…you can start today. No more excuses, often times, when it comes to weight goals or healthy eating goals we always say things like,” I’ll start tommorrow,” then tommorrow comes and you say you will start another day then the next thing you know, it’d December 30,2012 and you didnt acomplish any goals and you are in the same predicament you where in December 30,2011.

     Life is short, and we can waste so much time doing pointless things. But if we put discipline in practice we can reach the goals that we want… I mean are you tired of going around in circles…being fustrated with life, talking about what you want but not doing anything to attain the things that you want? You are in control of what you do! Make the moves..dont be complacent, facebooking all day when you have greatness on the inside of you!

   I encourage you as I encourage myself to identify what your distractions are and put a stop to them…Make the changes that you want to make..Whatever you do, do it with purpose…when you log onto facebook, twitter or youtube have a purpose for going on there, because I can guarantee if you dont have a purpose, you will be surfing, looking at people’s pictures that you don’t know or once knew… I am telling you….get disciplined it will pay off later. Finish what you start..better yet, see yourself at the finishline before you start!

I will leave you with this,

Proverbs 14 :25 Hardwork is worthwhile, but empty talk will leave you poor.

TTYL dolls and gents!

Darlicia

Modesty is defined as reserve or propriety in speech, dress, or behavior. I am all for modesty and being stylish. Dressing modest does not mean that you have to dress like this:

Modesty almost seems like it is lost…women do not leave anything to the imagination anymore.. At the end of the day, the way that you dress can send a message to the World. If you walk out the house with dressed provocatively, then do not be surprised if a guy approaches you in a jerk-like manner. (I am not giving a man an excuse to address a women in any circumstance.) I was once viewed a documentary on women’s clothing and how men viewed women who dressed a certain way and one man said that if he sees a girl dressed a certain way he feels entitled to touch her, or grab her…again, men should respect a women no matter what she is wearing. However, I think that women need to understand, whether you like it or not, that you are judged by your appearance. Now, I have heard church girls ( I believe there is a distinct difference between being a church girl and a woman of God) say things like, “Well, I can wear what I want because a) God knows my heart or b) Man can judge me from the outside, but God is looking at my heart.” First and foremost, your actions as well as some of the choices you make in your clothing can show what is in your heart. You can look attractive, without showing all your humps and lumps. A man may give you the attention you want when you are dressed this way, but trust, he is thinking only about smashing. 

Summer time is underway and the things I see on a day to day basis in the summer, are crazy… Just for the record, shorts that show the blacks of your behind are NOT cute. You can still be you, be stylish and MODEST. 

I want to stir up your thoughts, if you dress with the intent to get sexual attention from men, you need to look inside and think about your self worth. I understand that some fashions and trends are made to accentuate certain things on the female body.I find that in society, media objectifies women, and sends messages that we are our bodies…and this attitude goes back hundreds of years ago..i.e. Sarah Baartman. If a man likes you, he will like more than just what is on the outside. So when you get dressed….what are your intentions?

Also, ladies you have to understand that the way that you carry yourself is very important because this, more than anything speaks highly of you. Many young girls feel like if they are “all up on” a guy or make sexual connotations in conversation or dress a certain way that it will make guys like them. As I have said before, they may give you that attention, but they have a one track mind and that is to smash.I have been in classrooms with teenage boys who agree with this as well as grown men who would also agree.

Ladies, you  are more than your breasts, hips, thighs and vajayjay… Know who your are and know your worth.

Here are some cute, stylish edgy and classy clothes:

These where just a few samples…I will definitely be showcasing more fashion on this blog. *toodles*

This topic, whenever I see it on blogs and even on Youtube sparks alot of debate: Heat Training Natural Hair. Now my take on it is that it is perfectly fine. Everyone who  has natural hair or went natural didn’t go natural to wear their curls all of the time. I for one, like diversity in hair styling. Many people argue that it is damaging to your hair, but at the same token, it is damaging if you are racking through your hair to de-tangle it, ends will get split. Then there are some who think that women with curly hair shouldn’t want to wear their hair straight. How an individual styles their hair is totally up to them. You can put extensions in your hair, straighten it and that does not mean that you are trying to be something that you are not. The only things I think you have to be careful of when you do heat train are a) the type of heat appliances you are using..its in your best interest to use a ceramic iron. Not just a curler with hotplates. b) minimize your heat training to twice a month. This will prevent heat damage which can include losing your curl pattern or messing it up. BTW, I DO heat train!

Smooches N Dueces,

Darlicia

So, I am sure that you guys don’t know that I am #teamnatural (shoutout to all the natural girlies) But I am going to admit that I had grown frustrated with the difficulty of my shampoo and conditioning process. I made up in my mind that I would give it one last shot and if things didn’t didnt go smoother, I was going to walk into Target and buy a box of relaxer. I knew that I needed to find the right product. I found the Shea Moisture line in the Ethnic Hair Care section at Target. I had seen good reviews on Youtube and the price was very reasonable (much cheaper than Miss Jessie’s line) so I figured why not?

As I do when I buy something new, I wanted to try it as soon as i got home, so I did. I washed my hair with the Moisture Retention Shampoo by Shea Moisture then I deep conditioned my hair with the Deep Treatment Masque….Now ladies, and gents when you have natural hair, the manageability of your hair highly depends on   your deep conditioning. I sat under the dryer for about twenty minutes. When I rinsed the product out of my hair…..my hair was EXTREMELY soft.  So I proceeded with my shampoo/condition process which is to take a giant tooth comb and section my hair, put it in big braids and sit under the dryer. (This helps with manageability and helps prevent tangling) Then I took the braids out and went over my hair with the blow dryer and finished by flat ironing my hair.

I was VERY impressed with the results the Deep Moisture Mask had on my hair. If was very soft, extremely easy to comb through as well. The great thing about this product is that it doubles as a styling lotion. (It is thick, so when using as a styling agent, apply a small amount.) This product turned my shampoo/condition regime into a much easier task….no tangles, no pain and easy management. For $9.99 it is a great buy and I will DEFINITELY be purchasing this miracle product again. :)

Jealousy is a very ugly thing and honestly it makes no sense. There is always going to be someone that is more talented than you, prettier, smarter and so on. You have to be happy with yourself and the gifts that you were given, that way you wont be threatened by the next person. Lets say you are a singer, you may not have a super big voice, but use your gift to the best of your ability, no use coveting what the next person has.

As I stated earlier, jealousy is a VERY ugly thing. It tears apart families, ruins friendships and romantic relationships and most importantly it EATS AWAY at the person holding jealousy in thier heart….It takes too much energy to be jealous of someone or something and you never know what the person you are jealous of went through to get to where they are. For all you know, you may not have been able to handle everything that they went through to get to where they are. So if you are someone who is jealous you need to examine yourself and your heart and get happy with yourself. #thatall

-smooches n dueces-

Darlicia

Wow….. I can honestly say that this has been THEE most trying season of my life.. Im not going to get into details about what is going on but WOW is really all that I can say. I thank God for sending me a spiritual sister to keep me accountable and pray for me and to encourage….not many people understand what I am going through right now, I know I am not the only one going through something, but man…its been rough. I am having to encourage myself DAILY that where I am is only temporary and that if I can just stick out just a little bit longer that everything is going to be alright….Im learning that you can also not compare your life to other people..this will end horribly. One of my dear friends had to remind me that I am destined for greatness and that there are things that i will have to go through that other people will not have to experience because everyone is not going where I am going….which is true, so there is no need to compare. We all have different roads to travel. Times like these really test your faith….and for those of you out there who are going through something I want to encourage you as well that if you just hold on a little while longer, everything is going to be alright.

This quote from Apostle Clifford E. Turner is sooooo true: When you can not trace God, Trust God.  We all get tested at different levels according to our spiritual maturity.. I think many Christians have been put to the test where they are like, “God, where are you!” and in tests and trials, many of us get mad at God, i can personally attest to that. As I said before, I have to encourage myself daily and a big part of staying encouraged through rough times is staying in the word of God and staying prayed up.

This was just a little bit of my blurb for right now, leave a comment below!

-smooches and dueces-

Darlicia